Ashley McManus
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5 Ways Working Moms Can Survive the Holidays

11/8/2021

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Photo by Kate Hliznitsova on Unsplash
While one could argue Mom is always a pillar in her family, we are heading into the throes of what I consider to be “Mom as the Pillar” season. You know, the time where moms have to rise to the occasion, create the magic and be all the things: the family backbone, the nurturer, (if you are a working mom) provider, mediator, etc. The holidays often challenge us to step into all of these roles as best we can, even though it may be outside our comfort zone. But come January, we often learn how capable we are.

There are a few things I wanted to highlight that I hope you consider as we head into November: 

  1. Our perceived flaws are perceived. Time seems to slip away this time of year. If you find yourself scrambling, or realize you forgot something, try to center yourself with some perspective. No one cares how clean your house is, how perfect the meal was or how the table was set. Your kids will remember the magic of the holidays because of how they felt, the details will not stand out in their memory. 
  2. Focus on what you are good at, forget the rest. Not a good cook? Don’t put the success of Christmas into mastering the roast this year. Baking not your jam? Order pastries from the bakery and ask someone else to pick them up. Have an amazing Pinterest board for table setting ideas? By all means, go crazy. You’ll be much happier at the end of the season setting yourself up for success with your strengths then stressing about something that may not work out so well. 
  3. Don’t miss out on opportunities. It can be tempting to focus on the things that aren’t critical to your long-term success, especially at work. If you have been resisting a new opportunity because you feel like your plate is full, step into it and trust that you’ll figure it out as you go (which I’ve found to be my mantra and the mantra of most working moms these days). 
  4. Grow your container. This challenge is where we learn how much space we have in our lives for ourselves and others. Yes make sure your cup is full and yada yada yada, but don’t forget to push yourself just a little bit as well. Listen to yourself, and see where you can prioritize and what you can lean into this year. 
  5. Empowered boundaries. Putting your personal well being first will result in better service (as a mom, employee etc.) to your family and community. Don’t let your whole identity become wrapped up in the care of others: think about what brings you the most joy this time of year and make sure that you make the time for it!

In this last 8 weeks or so of the year, jot down some personal and professional thoughts - these may make some good fodder for those fast-approaching New Year’s resolutions: 

  • Where can I soften? 
  • Where can I put up boundaries? 
  • What are my personal needs? How can I go about meeting them for myself?
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